Tonight is dose #4 of my 50,000 unit vitamin D regiment. Something positive needs to start happening soon, this little pill is kicking my ass! I am going to have to switch my mouse around so I can use my left hand, the right one is not much good to me anymore. I'm going to have to give up my dream of playing the piano at Carnegie Hall, in part due to my hand, but mostly because I can't play a lick! After tonight I have 20 doses left. I'm starting to wonder when I get to do the Snoopy dance because I fell so good?
I think the hardest part about dealing with the MS is all the things I can't do? I can deal with using the mouse with my left hand, walking with a cane, those type of things are easy. So is knowing I won't ever go mountain biking with KarylC, or play softball with the guys from work. The things I'm having a hard time dealing with is all the crap with bathroom I could no longer do, or having to pay someone to come cut the grass and trim because of the boy's hand, and having to have my 83 year old father in law help me build my solar heater, when he gets home from volunteering at the senior golf championship! Yeah, it's hard to get your mind around the fact he is burning a schedule that would hospitalize me! The important thing is we do what we can, and we accept the things we can't. Yeah, right!
OK, what is this brain barrier thing that keeps coming up? I have a barrier around my brain that is supposed to keep bad things out, but mine malfunctioned and has allowed the bad guys in to attack the myelin on my nerves. How was that for a bare bones explanation? Can the BBB be repaired? Is that what the vitamin D is supposed to fix? My understanding is that the body can fix small breaches in the beginning, but as the beast progresses, you start to be overwhelmed and your body can no longer fix itself. Someone tell me I'm in the process of fixing that right now, and I'm going to be the poster child for big D, because I am at the point of being overwhelmed!